So anyways, instead of writing stuff like I love walking on the beach and going on vacations and seeing movies, try something more specific like I like subtitled films that are boring as shit, walking on nude beaches and visiting huts in Africa that don’t have TVs. If you’re a woman, you’ll look like a crazy cat lady. Or if you’re not ready for that, just photoshop your head onto Halle Berry’s body and post that shit. Sure, you can use a selfie, (and read this part carefully) AS LONG AS NO ONE CAN TELL IT’S A SELFIE.
That way people like me can avoid you like the plague. I guarantee a bunch of guys will swoon over you and as soon as they meet you in person they’ll be won over by your sparkling personality and won’t care that your picture was a total sham. Like you know those pictures people take of themselves in the mirror so you can see the camera? ‘Cause that kind of picture just screams, “Heyyy, I’m such a loser I don’t have any friends to take a picture of me!
Example services are: opening a dating site account and getting it up and running with 3-5 photos and a profile (for people not well-versed with the Internet) , flexibility to ask us all kinds of questions (for a fixed period of time e.g.
Writing an on line dating profile more than one fish dating site
I mean when I met my hubby online, here’s what I wrote to him: “I like meat, sports and beer.” A. If you’re a woman, post a picture of yourself with a dog.
If you’re a guy, post a picture of yourself with a baby. Don’t write your profile like you’re writing a text message. Remember, you F’ing rock and someone would be lucky to find you. In which case I hope you find someone and they dump your ass and you cry. If you like this, please follow me on twitter and Facebook and buy my book when it comes out this October.
You see, big corporations make BILLIONS off books like – way more than Shakespeare ever did – and it’s not happening by accident.
Publishing houses have teams of editors analyzing and tweaking new books to make sure they’ll pull the average reader into their magic and mystery.
Don’t think for a second these giant companies would risk their time and money before they’re certain it’s going to attract the big bucks.
Now, I know some purists out there aren't going to like what I’m about to say.
If you wish to understand the concepts behind these examples, please read our tips for writing your online profile.
Example 1: Light-Hearted and Silly I may not be a supermodel, but at least I smell nice... When I'm not busy saving the world or just ‘being awesome', I spend my time working as a bartender and part-time chef.
” I don’t give a rat’s ass if Justin Bieber does it. Unless you ARE Justin Bieber and you’re reading this in which case, holy crap, Justin Bieber is reading my blog.