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This article aims to bring some reasoning to those frustrations so that Black men and women can reach a compromise in an effort to rebuild the Black family.My grandmother would tell me this often when she was bestowing jewels of advice to me in regards to love and dealing with men. This love mantra if you will, is what assisted me in deciding who I should continue to date and whose time on my clock has just ended. This is why when I hear other Black women make comments that Black men are more willing to treat White women better while dating and in a relationship than they would Black women, I have to offer the screw face.I guarantee that the relationship did not begin with him mistreating you. This is why it is important to nip any bad behavior from your boo in the butt at first sight.

I think that before any sista can complain about how she is treated by a Black man, she must first decide what it is about her that would allow him to mistreat her.

In other words, before we can go on the attack we have to take ownership of our own issues.

Let me start by first reflecting on one of my grandmother’s mantras.

People treat you the way you teach them to treat you.

My mom hated seafood so we would often go get fish together and make fun of people at work, school, etc. I always made sure everyone felt welcome and included.

My dad is tremendously funny and a phenomenal story teller. I wore the same pair of vans tennis shoes to school for 5 years straight, had long un-brushed hair, and wore oversized sweatshirts and jean shorts to school. Because I wasn’t popular and because I was picky, I didn’t go on a single date until I was almost 20 years old. I thought it best to not deal with this all in real time in hopes that my Dad would come to his senses.Black men and women stand at the core of the Black family, and quite frankly, both appear to have lost communication with one another.Black men and Black women each face a very unique existence — especially in America, a country that’s plagued by racism.by Ree, “The (Ree)lationship Guide” It seems like the state of the Black family is a topic that has consistently gained traction over the past decade.On each side of the discussion, you have people wagging their fingers about the cause(s) of the Black family’s demise and what they believe needs to be done to fix it.It was only in 1967 that laws banning interracial marriage were deemed unconstitutional.

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