However, what I thought I knew about life and marriage was completely upended a couple of years ago when my wife of 24 years at the time abandoned my daughter and me for an openly gay woman. I have already failed at that advice, because I am dating and I am enjoying dating.
They problem is that the sexual landscape for Christians has changed tremendously during my lifetime.
" Answer: The question of dating during the divorce process is difficult to answer for several reasons.
” Half the time, things break down because of a lack of communication, where you’re too busy or concerned about “Am I sounding interesting?
Am I sounding like someone that they would want to have a second date with?
Being young, I didn’t ever picture myself getting with someone with has already been married. I’m just so torn because I do like him as a person but I’m worried that I may get insecure later or that he just won’t be committed.
And that closes you off as a person, because you don’t become susceptible to the signals and the environment that you’re in.
Even very Church oriented Christ centered Christians are having a hard time staying sexually pure.
This is even an order of magnitude greater in my opinion for divorcees my age. It can feel like time-traveling back to high school (or junior high for some of you). Remind yourself that you want to be faithful to God’s design for sexual intimacy, that you want to show respect and care for the woman you are dating, and that waiting has true benefits.God expects men to be the spiritual leaders of the home (Eph ) and it certainly requires an extra measure of grace to lead a woman who’s older than you.…I want to remind you that God intentionally (with good reason! Scripture informs us that God created man first chronologically for the sake of authority!Listen: “I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. Wouldn’t this have the effect of disproportionately leaving some women unable to marry for the sin of being alive too long? I should have relationships and sex all figured out by now right? Now that is exposed, I want to tell you where I am now and seek some prayerful wisdom.After all I am over half a century old with an adult son and a daughter in High School. Some advisers tell me that I need to wait until I am dead, well almost dead to start dating again.” As you said, they’re putting the cart before the horse. It’s like she’s putting too much pressure on herself, and she’s trying to create this relationship before the relationship even has a chance to create itself. I definitely think for women, it’s so hard for us just to kinda slow down and enjoy the dating process and not take it so seriously and not feel like there’s so much pressure and stress and “Oh, well he’s been divorced, so if we ever want to get married…” You know, she might date this guy for another couple of weeks and decide she doesn’t even want to be with him or he might decide the same thing, so I feel like the concern one week in is a little premature.