We are very happy and natural together when I let it flow. Years back, I dated a woman that was 12 years older than me.
I'm curious to see what others think: if you had friends in this type of relationship, would you think "She's a BABY! My parents had an 18 year age difference (she was 16 and he was 34 when they married [and he was her high-school teacher]- this was rural Alabama in the early 1950s when that wasn't so scandalous) and the marriage lasted for 30 years. (It wasn't a happy union, it's just that its unhappiness got tenure.) How much of my parents' unhappiness was based in the age difference I don't know, but I can't shake the feeling that when a guy goes after a gal half-his-age, however else he may justify it the lust for firm young flesh is high on the list of REAL motivations (not to say that he can't be intellectually attracted as well). Maybe you would do well to adopt my motto: I don't care WHAT you do, as long as you don't do it to me. at a small Liberal Arts College in New England, I'll say this. On the other hand, this does seem a bit icky to me. Before I started dating men twenty years older than me, I dated men the same age as myself, and one much younger.
" or would you think "one can't control where the heart will lead"? My husband's second wife was 17 years younger than him. I'm honestly not sure what motivates a 19 year old girl to go after a guy twice her age (it's definitely not money with this kid as judging by her car and clothes she's from a very well-to-do family). Or what I tell my kids- you worry about YOURself, and let others worry about THEMselves. Wht he is doing is very taboo among the upper echelon of college profs. It is not advisable to date students at your institution, and though I have personal objections to the age difference, in this situation it is more of a professional indecency. I'm honestly not sure what motivates a 19 year old girl to go after a guy twice her age (it's definitely not money with this kid as judging by her car and clothes she's from a very well-to-do family). Makes me wonder if this girl knows what she is doing, but hey! ;) In conclusion, this is none of our business, so let's just give a little shudder and forget about it.
she's certainly cute and seems really nice, but I can't get over the age difference.
I'm not going to say anything to him or her about it because it's none of my business, but it majorly bothers me (two levels: he's still a professor and she's still a student even if the college doesn't have a dating ban [unless students are in the professor's class] and the fact that she's by some definitions a minor and he's closing in on middle age]).
Pretty sure Amythest Schaber and her husband of "Ask an Autistic" You Tube fame fall under or near that category & they seem to be a wonderful, happy, healthy couple.
As with any situation where the potential for manipulation or coercion exist though, I'd say it has to be decided on a couple-by-couple basis.
Without those weightier responsibilities, Millennial boys (or, for the most part, the ones I've encountered) are living this suspended fratboy mentality.
Thus, we ladies have looked to older men to fulfill those more grown-up needs.
I would be afraid of taking her away from her youth. If he's ready and understands how you feel and you openly express that, I don't see why it would be a problem.
Having her lose the relationship experiences that we all have as we grow older. Incidentally, our relationship didn't end because of the age difference.
I have a co-worker with whom I'm work chums (we're not bosom buddies but we like each other at work- I'm sure you've had one).